


Six Songs

by Brumeier



Series: Bite Sized Fic [111]
Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: 5+1 Things, Alternate Universe - Music, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, Prompt Fill
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-03
Updated: 2016-09-03
Packaged: 2018-08-12 13:10:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7935976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brumeier/pseuds/Brumeier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>LJ Comment Fic for 5 Plus 1 prompt: <i>Stargate Atlantis, John Sheppard/Rodney McKay, five songs he played for the one he loved, and one song he'd never play.</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Six Songs

**A Boy Named Sue**

Dave was sick. Like, really sick. The doctor had come to the house and he’d talked to Dad about putting Dave in the hospital. But Dad wanted to discuss it with Mom first, and getting hold of her when she was on the road wasn’t easy.

John slipped into his brother’s room, and seeing Dave looking so small and feverish and miserable made John feel bad. He wasn’t technically supposed to be in there, just in case whatever Dave had was contagious, but John thought maybe he could cheer him up a little. 

“Hey. You want me to sing you a song?”

Dave nodded, his movements disturbingly slow and sluggish. John sat on the end of the bed and quickly tuned his guitar. 

He played _A Boy Named Sue_ , which always made Dave laugh and was just fun to play. And when he was playing for just the two of them, John always sang the cuss words.

 _And he said: "Son, this world is rough_  
_And if a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough_  
_And I knew I wouldn't be there to help ya along._  
_So I give ya that name and I said goodbye_  
_I knew you'd have to get tough or die_  
_And it's the name that helped to make you strong."_

_He said: "Now you just fought one hell of a fight_  
_And I know you hate me, and you got the right_  
_To kill me now, and I wouldn't blame you if you do._  
_But ya ought to thank me, before I die,_  
_For the gravel in ya guts and the spit in ya eye_  
_Cause I'm the son-of-a-bitch that named you "Sue.'"_

Despite the glassy eyes Dave was grinning, but Dad came in and chased John out before he could finish the song.

John spent the rest of the day sitting outside Dave’s room, playing all the songs he knew, and when the doctor decided his brother didn’t need to go to the hospital after all, John knew his mom was right: music was magic.

**Imagine**

Grace King was dead. It was all over the news, in all the papers. People re-telling her story, explaining the indelible mark she left on folk music and the anti-war movement. None of the reports talked about the sons she’d left behind.

John hated pretty much everyone. His father, who’d broken the news, and Dave, who was sad but not as much as John, who’d spent more time with her. He hated all the well-meaning people that brought casseroles and clapped him on the shoulder and told him his mother was in a better place now.

Her place was with her family.

John brought his guitar to the cemetery, despite Dad telling him repeatedly to leave the damn thing in the car. He wanted to sing one last song for his mother, one of her favorite songs because it had such a hopeful message. But he waited till everyone had gone, and Dad had taken Dave back to the car, because he wasn’t going to sing for an audience. Just Mom.

_Imagine there's no countries_  
_It isn't hard to do_  
_Nothing to kill or die for_  
_And no religion, too_  
_Imagine all the people_  
_Living life in peace... You..._

_You may say I'm a dreamer_  
_But I'm not the only one_  
_I hope someday you'll join us_  
_And the world will be as one_

John cried as he played, his breath hitching on almost every word. But when he finished he felt a little better. He promised his mother he’d be one of those dreamers. He’d help make the world a better place, somehow, just like she always wanted him to.

Although the world would never be good enough, not without Grace King in it.

**I’m Going To Go Back There Someday**

John had left his guitar and his old life behind when he joined the Air Force. He hated being told what to do, but for the chance to fly and be part of something bigger than himself – which he’d lost the day his mother died – John was willing to do almost anything.

And there were unexpected benefits. Like Lyle Holland. He was straight, had a wife back home, but that didn’t stop John from falling a little in love with him. Holland had a wicked sense of humor and a kind smile, and he was John’s best friend. He made life in the desert more bearable.

Holland had caught John singing in the shower, and when he found out that John’s mother was Grace King he’d asked John to sing for him. John loved him, he did, but singing was part of his past and he’d left that behind for a reason.

Until the day Holland got shot down. John disobeyed orders and went after him. He couldn’t leave his friend out there in the unforgiving sands, to be captured or die alone. John had to bring him back to his family, one way or another.

Holland asked him again to sing, and John couldn’t deny him this time. Not when Holland was so badly injured and it was doubtful either of them would make it back alive. He sang a song he’d loved as a kid, one that had somehow captured his love for the sky and his dream to someday be an astronaut. He thought Holland, a fellow flyboy, would appreciate it.

_Sun rises, night falls, sometimes the sky calls_  
_Is that a song there, or do I belong there?_  
_I’ve never been there, but I know the way_  
_I’m going to go back there someday_

_Come and go with me, it’s more fun to share_  
_We’ll both be completely at home in midair_  
_We’re flyin’, not walkin’, on featherless wings_  
_We can hold onto love like invisible strings_

It was the closest John could come to telling him how he really felt. Holland had thanked him, with tears in his eyes, and made him promise to keep singing, and to take up the guitar again. Made him promise to share his gift.

While John was passed out from sheer exhaustion, Holland died.

**You Shouldn’t Kiss Me Like This**

Never in his life had John felt the kind of immediate, electric attraction to anyone the way he did with Rodney. Maybe it was the way Rodney played the piano, putting his body and soul into every song. Or maybe the laser focus he employed when they were in bed, knowing just how to wring every bit of pleasure out of John until he was weak and trembling.

John suspected it was mostly the way that Rodney kissed, like there was nothing more important in the world, like John was everything. They hadn’t known each other long, and he couldn’t be sure they were anything more than fuck buddies, but those kisses…they made John want things he’d never had.

“You think this counts as cardio?” Rodney asked, panting. 

John was sprawled out on top of him, feeling loose and warm and happy post-orgasm. It made him a little loopy, and he started singing softly, his lips against Rodney’s skin.

_I got a funny feeling_  
_The moment that your lips touched mine_  
_Something shot right through me_  
_My heart skipped a beat in time_

_There's a different feel about you tonight_  
_It's got me thinkin' lots of crazy things_  
_I even think I saw a flash of light_  
_It felt like electricity_

He didn’t get any further into the song, because Rodney was kissing him soft and sweet, his fingers twisted in John’s hair.

“I had no idea sex made you sentimental,” Rodney said.

“You make me sentimental,” John replied. He tucked his head in the crook of Rodney’s neck. 

Rodney made him a lot of things, including hopeful that maybe he’d found someone he could make a future with. But it was definitely too soon to talk about that kind of thing.

**Honest I Do**

Being in love didn’t mean everything suddenly got easy. John and Rodney had different ways of looking at things, and different life experiences that factored into the decisions they made. They bickered a lot, although for the most part John enjoyed that. Rodney had a sharp tongue and sometimes John would provoke him just for fun.

But every once in a while they’d have a no-holds-barred, knock-down, drag-out fight and both would go off to their separate corners to lick their emotional wounds. When that happened, John almost always caved first.

He’d stand outside Rodney’s door and sing.

_Don't you know that I love you_  
_Honest I do_  
_I'll never please_  
_No one but you_  
_Please tell me you love me_  
_Stop driving me mad_

Sometimes Rodney made him sing the whole song twice. Sometimes he only got the first two lines in before the door swung open and Rodney pulled him into a frantic kiss.

Rodney always apologized, even when it wasn’t his fault, and that only made John love him more.

**Lush Summer**

John had initiated a group karaoke night, which included Ronon and his girl Jennifer, Teyla, and John’s friend Laura from work. Not all of them were singers – and Rodney would argue that John wasn’t much of one either – but they had fun.

There were the usual standards: _Don’t Go Breaking My Heart_ , _Tear In My Beer_ , _Fever_. But one night Laura chose a Grace King song, the only one in the karaoke catalog at the bar, and she begged John to sing it.

“No,” John said.

Laura pouted, but Rodney just fixed him with that focused gaze like he could see below John’s skin. Karaoke night moved on.

Later that night, when they were curled up together in bed, Rodney said, “You never sing any of her songs.”

“No. I don’t.”

“Is it okay if I ask why?”

John shrugged, his hand tracing random patterns on Rodney’s stomach. “It just never felt right. We always sang them together.”

He knew he couldn’t really explain it sufficiently, that void where his mother should be. Especially on _Lush Summer_ , which was one of the first songs he learned to play. He had hazy memories of them playing together, singing together, and trying to sing one of her songs now, solo…it wouldn’t be right.

But then he rarely had to explain things to Rodney, because he always seemed to understand.

“I wish I could’ve heard the two of you sing together,” Rodney said. He dropped a kiss on John’s forehead.

“Yeah.”

In his head he heard the lyrics, the blending of their voices and string work. And he wished his mother could’ve met Rodney.

_Long days_  
_Sitting in the shade_  
_You and me_  
_Lost in each other all day_  
_Innocent kisses with you_  
_Sun-warmed skin, heated glances_  
_You blush prettily_  
_Make promises_  
_You’ll never keep_

**Author's Note:**

> **Song List**
> 
>  
> 
> [A Boy Named Sue](https://youtu.be/WOHPuY88Ry4), Johnny Cash
> 
> [Imagine](https://youtu.be/yRhq-yO1KN8), John Lennon
> 
> [I’m Going To Go Back There Someday](https://youtu.be/mhGi4DtZl9U), Muppet Movie Soundtrack (Gonzo!)
> 
> [You Shouldn’t Kiss Me Like This](https://youtu.be/zwV2VM54CYA), Toby Keith
> 
> [Honest I Do](https://youtu.be/hJ3rFS_eM_g), The Rolling Stones
> 
> Lush Summer, Grace King


End file.
